I presented today in Composition Seminar. It was the beginning of the student presentations.
For the last few weeks, students in the seminar have been presenting the works of other established composers.
Today, I presented my own music. I presented my Alzheimer's Variations. It's quite the experience to present something that you had worked on. The piece has been a part of my life for quite a while now, even though it only reached it's finished form in Sept or October. I did a lot of thinking about it and even talking about it during it's conceptual stage - from the concept of musically representing a patient's decline through the stages of Alzheimer's Disease.
Then the piece took on a new life when I started writing the actual notes and putting them on the page. Once I finally got the notes on the page, it starting yet another new life, in the hands of my pianist. I guess that's the point at which it actually came to life. Then it was finally performed, after which it took on a different role, by the effect it had on listeners.
Since it's performance, I've had a very passive-reflective relationship with the piece. The compositional process had sort of come full circle. But today, and over the last few days, it's been an active-reflective process. I've had to relive and reevaluate the compositional process as well as the end result.
Anyway, I don't know why I'm rambling, I kinda thought if I wrote about it, something important to say would arise, but not really..... I suppose the moral of this story is that I just looked at the piece differently, in a new light and fresh perspective, and I hope I have the chance to do that with all of my pieces.