Sadness overwhelms me

Well, it's seriously been like a whole half a day, and still noone has commented on my blog. I am wondering whether people even read this thing. I am doubting the value of this blog and therefore, my value as a human being. Can't we all just get along?!?
Today was a fairly bland day. I woke up to drive my mother to work, so that I would actually wake up and get myself to the Health Sciences Centre so as to get blood work done for my upcoming appointment. While my mothers resourcefulness makes sense, I feel used and slightly bitter, but alas, that is nothing new. The blood taking wench in the lab tried to be all cocky, but like all the others, she had troubles finding a suitable vein. Nevertheless, I bled for her and it left a nasty bruise too.
Im having the usual fear/uneasy sensation that I always get before my bi-annual diabetes appointment. I am always conviced that the doctor is going to tell me that my control is terrible and that my death will soon be upon me and my kidney will swell up and he'll chop off my leg... you know the usual. The last appointment aside, for the last 5 years, I was always surprised to hear that my control was steadily improving, so the worry was unwarranted... until last appointment where Doc told me that indeed my control was less than ideal. Now that fear and worry is completely warranted again.
Have I made any improvement since last time?
Probably not, It's getting worse...
Soon the long term complications of diabetes will kick in and my life will slowly end...
Anyway, as usual, I should be using this feeling of uneasiness to convince myself to improve my control, which I will to some degree, but I will just have to wait until next wednesday.
After I came home from the blood letting wench, I practiced piano for a couple hours. I have an emsemble audition in 2 days, so I need to spiff up my audition piece. I don't think that having it memorized is a feasable goal at this point, so they will just have to accept that.
Practicing and having woken up entirely too early made me sleepy, so I napped. Then I woke up and ate tacos and practiced some more.
Speaking of tacos, who the hell buys 894 grams of ground beef and tries to pass it off as almost exactly a pound......My Mother To validate her stance, she pointed to the price which was $4.57. So at least I can understand how she made this mistake, it doesn't justify this grave injustice, but ya. In the end, there is much extra taco meat left over in the fridge, and not enough shells. I suppose it will be taco omlettes and pudding with taco meat, ooh perhaps taco meat smoothies... for the next little while.
Question of the day: Does it make me a bad person to no longer have even empathy for my dog? For the past few years he does nothing but bark and sleep, sometimes together. The prednisone he is taking puts him in a constant hunt for food, so he steals food all the time, rips open my backpack, barks because he is hungry, barks because he is bored, and more than likely barks because he is in a state of discomfort all the time. The prednisone has cause his stomach muscles to become slack making it difficult to get up off hardwood floors, making stairs unmanageable without assistance. He has lumps and a bulbous growth on the base of his tail which probably gets in the way of bowel movements, and will occasionally bleed all over the place. I fail to see what enjoyment he gets out of his life, and have been presuring my parents to have him put down. I realize that dogs don't do much anyway, but am I being too cold in this situation and ignoring my mother's emotions, or is she the one latching on without taking into consideration his concerns?