busy, busy

Around this weekend, I have three performances. I played the first one earlier today, I'm playing a Haiti benefit concert on Sunday, and the main event is my recital on Monday.

It seems the theme of my performing life has been NEW.

The pieces are new to the world - newly composed and some of them are even premieres. It's interesting to think - since some of the pieces are being recorded by the composers, I am setting a precedent for how the piece should be played. Performers often like to consult recordings of pieces they're learning, and even if they listen to mine and say, 'I hate the way he played that phrase!', I find it exciting to be part of the process.

The pieces are also new to me, in some cases very new. The longest I've been working on any of the pieces has been less than two months - learning notes over Christmas break. The shortest was a piece I played today, for which I only got the part on Monday. A few of the pieces I'm playing will only have one or two rehearsals as an ensemble before presenting them in a few days. At first, I was worried about trying to pull it together so haphazardly, but things are turning out very well so far. I definitely like this new faster pace.

When I think back to myself as a pianist just a few years ago, I played only a few pieces that were written within my lifetime, the majority of pieces I played were over a century old. They were also often played; for every piece, there were multiple recordings that I could consult. I was also much slower to learn music. Pieces and recitals fit nicely into academic years, where it took 3-6 months to learn a piece well enough to perform it.

As I am here, in the midst of a performing weekend, I can confidently say that I love the new; I love all the challenges and rewards it brings.

So little time...

It's not overwhelming, and I still feel pretty in control, but I'm getting a wee bit uppity about some upcoming things.

On Friday, I am playing at a new music university conference at Simon Fraser University, representing UBC in a couple of pieces. I just got the score for one of the pieces the other day and I haven't taken it to the piano yet. It won't be hard to pull together for the performance, but I'm not exactly thrilled about a last-minute addition in what is already a busy week.

In terms of the 'Michael Park and Friends' concert, I feel pretty prepared for myself, but this week will feature 2 first rehearsals. Long story short, this week will simply be spent largely at the piano.

I need to spend some quality time with my 'Alzheimer Variations'. I wrote them and have played them once before in concert, so I haven't worked on them much recently. There are some difficulties that I need to work out, however, before I perform them this time around.

Of course, there is also school. Over last weekend, I became exceedingly stressed that I would have to add on a whole extra course, over an already full courseload. After all the huffing and puffing, nothing has changed; I just wasted a lot of time and breath...

While this is a fairly stressful time, I'm enjoying it. Keeping me going are the promising opportunities that are on the horizon.

Oh, I forgot to mention, over the last week and a half, I've had two sets of friends staying at my apartment. Fun times have ensued, but I would be lying if I said it didn't have an impact on how much time I've spent working. Nevertheless, it's definitely been worth it!

Is numbing good?

I'm getting better at dealing with poverty.

I hit a low point this summer when I moved across the country without really having enough money. I broke down and cried in front of my new roommate. I rarely cry, and I can't remember the last time it was so sincere and in front of someone.

It was because I realized I was powerless, pitiful; I didn't have the money to do things I needed to do. Not having money for things I want... sure it sucks, but hardly worth getting upset over. Foreseeing that I couldn't afford rent or food or drugs upon arriving - that got me.

Today, it was going to the pharmacy and having my debit card declined. But it was different, the embarrassment and helplessness weren't nearly as strong.

I took off the non-prescription items, but the prescriptions still cost more than I had. I walked home to check out finances online. I felt a tinge of worry and the same feelings from earlier this summer, but numbed. I'm glad that I'm not letting this interfere as much with my life, but I generally don't like being numbed.

It bothers me that some people can watch extreme violence in movies simply because they've seen it so much. The idea that you can be moved less after hearing a piece of music over and over prevents me from obsessing.

But for now, I'm all right with feeling less worry, less pain, less anxiety.

In other news, things are going pretty well. I'm getting lots read, written, and even playing lots!

A Day of Opportunities

I was awoken this morning by a phone call. Long story short, I now have 2 piano students back-to-back on Fridays. I've been wanting to teach piano for the last few years, but the opportunities didn't present themselves easily and I just couldn't have made it a priority - especially without having a decent piano where I live. I will be going to their house for weekly lessons, which is not ideal, but they live decently close.

I'm glad that this adds two wonderful things to my life: Structure and Finances!

The concert I will be playing on Feb. 1st is coming together, slow but sure. Also, there were some mentions today of other opportunities for the Composers' Collective, through which I could likely pursue my piano career. I feel good about myself as a pianist - quite a difference from how I was feeling fresh out of my undergrad.

So far this year, I've played two concerts, both of which had only one or two pieces. On the Feb 1st concert, I will be playing for about 40 minutes in five different pieces. It will be a definite step up: a greater challenge. There's lots of work to do yet, and 3 weeks in which to get it done!

A New Friend

Never satisfied to knit just the standards, scarves and mittens, I've taken on more interesting projects. Over the last few years, and especially since moving to Vancouver, I've been knitting stuffed toys. We have lots of room above the cupboards in our kitchen, so a jungle is growing there.

Lady Chach is the newest addition to the jungle.

One of my friends is expecting a second child. When they asked his daughter for name suggestions, she said 'Lady Chach". As they will not likely use that name for their child, I have taken it as the perfect name for this dandy little boy elephant!

The tale of Lady Chach, is longer than the tail of Lady Chach, which you can't actually see in the picture, but you get the point...

Lady Chach seemed destined for failure, almost from the outset. The pattern was poorly written and had mistakes throughout. I didn't have grey yarn, so I figured that pink would do. As the knitting went on, I ran out of the original pink, so I had to switch to a different shade of pink, then a fuzzy pinkish yarn, and blue for the foot pads. When it came time for the ears, a darker rose colour and purple were necessary. Before Lady Chach was suggested, he was destined to be called Patches.

Because of the constant problems with his creation, I cursed poor Lady Chach the whole time. Through his light coloured pink skin, you can see some of the darker coloured shopping bags with which he is stuffed.

Lady Chach is far from perfection, but I love him anyway!

He's just so damned adorable with his extremely dilated pupils and effeminate lashes!

For now, he's taken up residence on top of the stove fan/light, but things are always changing in the jungle. My roommate and I have plans in the not-so-short-term future to make a delightful stop motion film with the animals. Who knows what other creatures will be around by the time that happens.

For now, here is a listing of the current jungle inhabitants:

Lady Chach, the elephant

Penquin, the penguin

Pigette, the pig

a blue and yellow poison-dart tree frog

an owl

and Leo, the lion

Eventually, I'll get more pictures, but for now they need to get their sleep. And I just might follow their lead.

Golden Girls

I can't remember if it was my mom or my grandma that used to watch it, but I recall seeing the Golden Girls at various times. Now, I don't need to recall, because I can just watch it!

It started in Winnipeg; one of the channels was showing a seemingly non-stop Golden Girls marathon. One episode became two, two became three, and so forth.

Now, I'm working my way sequentially through the series. It will take a while, but it's good to know I have 4 great friends willing to help me through the coming months of procrastination!

As you may know, sometimes I don't get jokes and I need a diagram to explain....

Rose is amazing! Betty White's portrayal of dumb and naive is inspirational.

Every once in a while, I'm reminded:

I am addicted to Diet Coke.

It's not just the caffeine; for the first few days back, I've been having my Coffee Pu'ehr tea, which is great and delicious, but I've still been getting irritable and headachy.

I bought a bottle today and drinking it made me feel so good.

Addiction, yes. Problem, uncertain...

I don't see how this actually could be a problem. Some might say the cancer thing, but I've been drinking it since I was 8 - I figure the damage is already done.

Just in case you need something to moo or howl about, my last diet coke before today was before my flight on Saturday morning...

at 6:45 am!!!

Take that, 10am History and Theory classes!

Feeling 'Home'

Stepping out of the airport into -30 air

lungs freezing, burning, freezing

This is Winnipeg

sitting in the back of my parents' Impala which has driven me from one side of the city to the other

watching the cold bobble-headed pig slide across the dash

This is the Winnipeg I know

watching through the frosted window, familiar scenes with subtle shifts

arriving home, entering a house filled with memories

and doilies

sleeping on a daybed, steps away from the room where I spent so many years.

This is the Winnipeg I know, but it's different

visiting

seeing friends

meeting acquaintances

spending time with remnants of a past

This is the Winnipeg I knew, but it's different, distant

Stepping out of the airport into rain-scented air

arms and back aching with the weight of luggage

carrying an old life into a new city,

little by little

This is a city I barely know, but it's familiar, closer

sitting on a bus, like a direct road to home

bags feeling lighter as the key unlocks the door

here I am

This is the city I know.

Magic!

What is it about magic that is so captivating?

I went to a big, shiny, dazzling spectacle of a magic show today. Two hours of pretty much every kind of trick you can imagine - Vegas style, with backup dancers and a moderately-modestly scantily-clad assistant.

It's not that I'm skeptical, but I spent most of the time trying to see the trick, trying to figure out how it's done. Mostly, I wouldn't want to be a naive observer.

At the same time, I don't want to know:

I remember when a bunch of my friends were into magic tricks as kids. I learned a few, but I was never able to get satisfaction from pulling the wool over other people's eyes. Once I understand the trick, it's ruined for me. Call me selfish, but I want to remain ignorant so I have claim to that sense of wonder.

After the magic show, I went for some food with a group of people I went to music school with. It was a delightful time and I loved hanging out with some of my most devoted readers.

A magical shout-out to Chief No-Balls, The Illustrious D, and a delightful Pet Wolf/Cow!

I believe I'll be spending new year's with the same group of people, so I'll leave that for another day.

Who knows if I'll have a chance to post again tomorrow, so 2009, I bid you adieu!

Here we go 2010!

Flavour Tripping

Have you ever heard of Miracle Berries?

They are pretty nifty!

Miracle berries make anything that would normally be sour, taste sweet. I ate slices of lemon, lime, grapefruit, oranges, and blackberries. They were incredibly sweet and delicious. I also had a sizable sprinkle of salt, which was an interesting experience; it made me salivate like you do when you have something salty, but it didn't taste overly salty.

It also took the bite off of some normally unpleasant liquids!

I hate vinegar. I hate vinegar a lot! I smelled the vinegar in the little shot glass and it smelled horrible, as usual, but then I sipped it and it was not disgusting at all. I won't say it was delicious, but it was completely different. I also drank scotch and rye - they had no bite whatsoever. This could be very dangerous... but I stayed moderate.

In conclusion, the effect was pretty super. At the same time, it reminded me that I'm not such a big fan of sweetness. Sure, I like 'sweets' as much as the next guy, but this was more of that puckery, sickly sweet sensation - a little too much for my tastes. Nevertheless, I do recommend giving it a whirl.

Happy tripping, my flavourful friends!

Already finished with Christmas!

My parents just left to drive my sister and brother-in-law to the airport in Grand Forks. I am staying at home with the puppy dog.

I love my puppy niece. We're sitting together on the couch, having quiet time. She has separation anxiety, so having 4 of the 5 people in the house leaving at the same time was rather upsetting. I took her for a walk while they were leaving - it made thing quite a bit earlier. Nevertheless, she's a little mopey because she can tell that her parents have left.

Anyway, back to this post's title. Because H and G are gone for the holidays, we did Christmas dinner yesterday and presents this morning. My parents and I will still go to my grandpa's for Christmas eve, but it's nice to be done with the holidays.

Rather, it extends them - extra joyousness for everyone!

A Christmas like the olden days.

I did all of my Christmas shopping today. It went by quickly because I had a very limited budget - 20$ per person for my mom, dad, and sister-and-brother-in-law.

This is the lowest Christmas budget I've had since maybe early high school or I don't know when...

When I was in high school, my sister and I were both working part-time jobs where other than 'savings', 100% of that income was expendible. I expended a lot closer to that 100% than my sister, but that's a different story altogether. Since that point, the amount we've spent on gifts for each other as a family has gone up and up. The last few years, while living in Ontario, I shouldn't have spent as much as I did, but I did anyway. Even though everyone knew my student-esque financial situation, I felt I needed to give generously anyway...

This year, I chose my budget only because that is all the money I COULD spend. Now I have literally JUST enough to pay tuition in January, not bounce a cheque that should be cashed in the next few days, and make a minimum payment on my credit card.

Now, I'm doing something that I've been thinking about for a while, but haven't had the courage to actually do - I'm taking my debit and credit card out of my wallet and leaving them at home.

It's two weeks until my payday, for which the money is already spoken. I might get some pity money from my parents, or something in christmas cards, but I'm not counting on anything.

This is going to be the christmas of no spending.

Term is almost over...

I fly to Winnipeg on Tuesday.

I have a paper due on Tuesday.

I hope that the paper doesn't take until the very last minute because I'll need to pack, but we'll see.

I'm looking forward to friends and family, just not the cold. I think I'm becoming a wimp with weather. That Winnipeg-bred boy is disappearing. Oh well, I love an excuse to wear hand-knit items... er... winter ones...

It's really hard to believe the term went by so quickly.

Anyway, I'll post from Winnipeg in a few days.

For now, I need to work hard!

Lifesavers, my lifesavers.

The Illustrious D brought up a good point when he asked about the diabetes sponsorship placement program. I suppose it's not a real program, per se, but one of the biggest happenstance sponsors of diabetes is...

Lifesavers Candy!

These have been a part of my life since I was diagnosed. I'm sure I had them before, but in my mind they are tied very strongly to my condition.

They are what they are: Pure Sugar!

I know there are other products that are aimed specifically at treating low bloodsugars in diabetics, but I think these maintain a high rank amongst diabetics.

My standard for treating a low is orange juice, but lifesavers are perfect for when juice is not handy. Juiceboxes are handy ish, but lifesavers won't burst open and make everything sticky in your backpack if you sit on it... (Thanks grade 3!)

Growing up, mom always had a pack in her purse. Now, there's a pack in my jacket pocket or bag at all times.

No, this isn't one of those cheesey MasterCard commercials from a few years back. Just a boy proclaiming his love for those sweet little circles!

I made it up and down the mountain and home again safely! The picture above was taken at the summing of Mount Gardner, on the helicopter pad.

I should have posted earlier when I was super positive about it. I'm still mostly super positive about it, but I'm getting exponentially sorer as the evening progresses. I think I'm going to down some advil and have an early night.

I had been worried about my sugars last night, but I woke up at 8.9 - a healthy enough number. I corrected and eventually had a timmy ho's breakfast sandwich to start the day off with protein. By the time we started the hike, they were down a bit and not long into the hike they were establishing that downward pattern so I started munching on the lifesavers.

Just under an hour in, I started eating a granola bar. My mouth was getting dry, I felt my sugars moving down and I was weak - I stopped and passionately told my friends that I was having serious doubts that I would be making it to the top of the mountain. I could not ask for better hiking friends. They reassured me and told me we could take as many breaks as I needed. I stopped, drank water, ate lifesavers and felt better. After a few minutes, I was happy with my sugars and we continued. A mixture of dehydration and lowering sugars does not make for a functional hiker.

Long story short, I pulled through and made it to the top, frolicked a bit, shivered because of exposed winds and impressed myself and friends at how well I did.

Diabetes: We hiked for almost 4 and a half hours. During this time, I took NO insulin and I ingested 2 packs of lifesavers, half a granola bar, and 1.5 sandwiches; about 115 carbs. My sugars never went above 6.7 or below 3.9. This, was even with the considerable decrease in Lantus, my background insulin.

Diabetes management is so much easier when you are constantly exercising vigorously. I am reminded of the summer when I worked in a factory - I barely needed any insulin aside from the background insulin.

Yet, another reason I should exercise more...

Anyway, I'm sore now, but it was well worth it. I look forward to more hiking in the new year.

I'll be comin' round the mountain...

It's quarter after 11 and I'm getting ready for bed. This is unprecedented!

Tomorrow, I am meeting a small group at 7am to go hiking up Mount Gardner. I don't know much about what these numbers mean, but it's about 600M up and the length of the trail is 17 kilometers-ish. We're going to do it at a leisurely pace, 6 hours roundtrip.

Living so close to these magnificent chunks of rock, it's something I need to do. Why wouldn't you?!?

As someone who is out-of-shape, I'm a little worried. Nevertheless, I'm treating this as an opportunity. Either I'll be surprised at myself tomorrow and gain self-confidence, or it'll be the kick in the ass I need to get myself to be more active!

As a diabetic, there's lots to think about.

Any kind of extended exercise wreaks havoc on sugars. I remember one day, walking around downtown Vancouver for a few hours - I turned my insulin pump off and my sugars were still plummeting.

I'm packing lots of sugar: sandwiches, trail mix, granola bars, life savers, glucogel and I'll buy a thing of juice sometime tomorrow morning.

Also, I'm cutting my basal insulin by a chunk - down from 36 Lantus to 28. It will effect me for the whole day, but I think that's a compromise I'm going to have to make for safety's sake.

I hate that I have to think so much about something that should be so freeing, but a little bit of pre-planning can make all the difference.

I can't wait to get back tomorrow and have lots of stories to tell and pictures to show!

Technology illuminates creepers...

With all of my attempts at updating my website, I added Google Analytics to my website and blog so I can see if I'm actually getting any traffic.

Surprisingly, it tells me that I have some silent readers - those of you who never comment...

Don't worry, I don't know any specifics - just numbers and countries.

Long story short, I'm glad to know that people are reading.

I am motivated to make this blog even better for all my faithful readers! I've learned from previous experiences that you won't make suggestions about what I should write about, so I'll try new and exciting directions!

Starting next time...

Closing down a month

Well, there's only twenty more minutes in November.

Aside from blogging 30 times this month, almost even on the proper days, I don't really feel like I accomplish much in November. School flew by because I didn't really have any assignments. Now I have a presentation and a paper left, and that's all I have to do before I leave for Winnipeg.

I feel like I should have something profound to say, but I don't.

Just that I'm looking forward to the end of term, the start of new projects, and the new year.

Sunday's Post - NaBloPoMo's Penultimate

Once again, I don't seem to have a schedule that allows for regular, daily blogging. Nevertheless, I kept up and there's a post for every day of the month!

This was not the most productive weekend, but it was enjoyable. I did some practicing for the concert, which I'll post about in the next entry, and a little bit of work on my presentation, but not enough of anything. I was somewhat social, but I was also fairly hermitty.

I met with my poet again, and this time it was more social. I really enjoy conversing with him. We have a shared sense of artistic ideology which I haven't felt like I had in common with anyone since I was involved with the dance improv scene in Winnipeg. Long story short, it's a good feeling and I'm glad to have like-minded artists around!

I've emailed a few people, and it seems like there won't be a festivus this year, at least not with the group that I usually celebrate with. This seems like the year that many high-school friends are just not coming back to Winnipeg. I can't blame people, but it will be a different Christmas this year. My sister and brother-in-law are going to Thailand for the holidays, so it's just going to be me and my parents. At least I'll get more work done....

I spent far too much time yesterday updating my website.

Really, I only changed one thing - updated from mp3 samples to full streaming audio.

Check it out: www.michaelpark.ca

I'd previously used myspace as my audio hosting, but now I can have it all available on my website - I feel much more professional.

This evening, I get to help babysit a friend's three year-old daughter. She's super cute, and with three babysitters, I'm sure it will be lots of fun and fairly low-key.

Friday is techno-savvy blogging day!

It's Friday evening and I'm staying in to get some work done. You know you're a grad student when...

Actually, I passed up a pot-luck tonight, which is very much out-of-line for a grad student.

I've been fussy and cranky lately - not exactly sure why, but I'm just feeling like I'm wanting to be a bit anti-social this weekend.

After some troubles with proprietary audio file types today, I put some recordings up of my latest performance last month.

They are available on my myspace page, but since I'm getting more and more techno-savvy, here it is, embedded!

First and Second Movements

Third Movement

Fourth and Fifth Movements

I play another concert on Monday - also through the UBC Contemporary Players, but this time the piece is quite a bit shorter. I hope to have a recording available a little bit sooner than it appeared this time around